Even the best fall down, sometimes.

They say 18 is when you grow up. Me. I grew up at 21. This year proving to be different than those before it. One where things I never needed to question,  I inquired about. So then , I suppose what they say about “Age just being a number” is true. For age doesn’t define experience.

This year I learned a plethora of lessons. Some taking longer to acquire than others, I learned though. I grew. I literally reference my new found growth, to shedding skin. That’s what it feels like at-least. As though I shed. I mean my self-identity is intact.

For usually when people lose a sense of self, they lose sight of who they are, what purpose they serve and what they aim to be. Me, I know the old me and am slowly learning the new parts of me. More importantly I’m taking the time to really understand why I’ve become what I am today.

I can’t honestly say that today, I love every part of me but instead that I am learning to.

4 Comments on “Even the best fall down, sometimes.

  1. What type of advice would you give to others having problems loving themselves? To someone who can’t seem to shake off these images put out there by our own society? To someone who might be in too deep?
    I like the article btw…fair and sweet.

    Liked by 1 person

    • First, I would say that to begin to love yourself would entail accepting all your flaws. Realizing your human, and we all make mistakes. Every one is a sinner, we just all sin differently. Unless, if by flaws you are talking about insecurities. Then, I would recommend daily affirmations and surrounding yourself with good quality people.

      As for what you claim society is projecting on you, If you’d like more in-depth advice, you can personally contact me. To advise you for that I would need a little more details or specifics. Your comment/ inquiry is too general to answer.

      Lastly, no on is ever too deep. Even if your standing on the edge, doesn’t mean you HAVE to jump. Remember that. Remember that any and all decisions we make, only we can hold ourselves accountable for. Another thing to remember is that we should be ever evolving and always strive to change and better ourselves.


      • Definetly. I’m god fearing, so to make things simpler for me, I leave it up to him. I feel like that’s how he intended things to be for us. I try my best to STAY aware of what’s going on in my life. Both internal and external. But yes, I want to say I was speaking about insecurities in particular. It’s such a complex topic to me because I’m still sort of enwrapped in some of the negativity and it confuses me at times…although I do believe I’ve been making progress in this last year. But a little about me…I’m of African descent(not African American), but I live in the states. I have that luxury of having that rich west African culture and upbringing, but I also get to see what it’s like for the blacks in the US(I was born in the US). One would think that I might’ve gotten used to it by now, but I approach things differently. I’m big on potential and what could be…even since I was a youth. It gives you something to work for, builds character, develops your integrity as a human, and you learn about yourself, as well as others. Which I thank god for…that’s the most beautiful thing he’s given me so far…perspective and the chance to grow in this life. I went off on a tangent, but that’s a little bit about me. As far as these insecurities, I’m going to try and make it as simple as possible, so I don’t end up confusing myself. We all represent something…in this case, let’s say that I represent west Africa, as well as black culture. I love both of these things bc it’s a part of what I am, but lately I’ve been seeing too many examples of how “low” we are . And it genuinely baffles me bc I come from such great wealth, but me and my people are extremely misrepresented in this American society. Now I think American society is great in it of itself, but our value and wealth as blacks in America is really ruining things for us. I’m a bit older now, but I can’t even imagine how the younger folk are perceiving this. There’s tension in our communities and it’s not allowing our potential to turn into something of substance. When I’m in an area where no one else looks like me, I feel constricted bc often times I’m gawked at. I hold true to who I am, so I don’t switch up, but wow. It’s just crazy how some of these ppl are reacting to my presence and it leaves me w/ an unsettled feeling. I’m a nice guy lol, but I’d be lying if I said there isn’t anger and rage in me. I love what god has made me and I won’t compromise for anyone or anything…but I’m troubled, still…

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I am glad to hear that you are a conscious individual who is compelled to look toward the future in terms of the collective success of your community. If I am understanding correctly, you are dissatisfied for two reasons.
    First, you are dissatisfied by the larger American community for alienating blackness to mean one ethnic identity and one narrative. ( As you’ve said, not every black person is an African American.) However, when you do assimilate to the larger black community, you are dissatisfied by the perceived status of the group (socio-economic, intellectual,etc). I would like to suggest, however that you take a more positive outlook. It is excellent that you are trying to make a realistic evaluation of your community’s contribution to society, but I think we are often consumed by the flaws and setbacks (what is mass-produced by popular culture and media) without being aware of substantial achievements. I am sure that, in this moment in time, there are many people in the black community who are building and funding amazing projects, and who represent themselves well as spokespeople and learned scholars. Read their stories, be proud of them, and share that pride with others, so that they too can be inspired to regard their success as achievable.
    Secondly, advocate your aspirations to the community. It is good to have high expectations upon the youth especially. The systematic oppression that the black community often contends with, whether from a racial or class perspective, is difficult to overcome. But the oppressed, or anyone who does not feel well-positioned in life, must not wallow in this state of victimhood. They must feel empowered, and change the narrative with their own hands.
    Lastly, and I know this may be difficult, I would suggest trying to be more inclusive when you consider what ‘community’ means. The more we are compelled to think of and treat American and non-Americans (regardless of race, ethnicity, religious affiliation, etc) as our fellow partners in humanity, the more we can feel a truer sense of belonging.
    Hope this helps!


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